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Hitting Pause

As a young reporter, I had a “portable” tape recorder that was heavy, about the size of a bread box, but it had fantastic audio quality. It had quirks including a sticky pause button. When you really needed to hit the pause button, there was a 50/50 chance it would temporarily stop the recording and you really had to whack the button to release it. It was easier to plow forward with the recording instead of wrestling with the damned thing.

I recalled that relic of a tape recorder recently when I finally hit the sticky pause button of my life after soldiering through months of a pandemic and recent riots in Minneapolis. One day, as I flailed my way through an on-air interview, it dawned on my that I hadn’t taken any time off since early March. I was fried. Physically and emotionally. While many of you hit the pause button, sheltering and working at home, using the cessation in our collective lives thanks to Covid-19, I kept going.

The end result wasn’t pretty.

The pause I took came at a time of great upheaval at work but ultimately I found time to come to some equilibrium. For that I’m grateful. While on vacation, I saw a tweet from Lars Leafblad, a Twin Cities executive recruiter and social connector. He mentioned a friend of his who said:

“We grow towards the questions we are asking of ourselves and others.”

I love that! How true. I had forgotten. My dear friend Bruce Kramer wrote in “We Know How this Ends: Living while Dying” how he learned as a leader that questions lead to possibilities while “closing creativity with answers.”

So, in addition to hanging out and recharging, I did some serious question asking of myself. What questions are you asking right now?? Let me know.

2 Comments

  • Dear Cathy,

    It touched me to read your experience and the next journey you find yourself on now. Your reference to your friend Bruce Kramer and your work and experiences with him are surely so impactful. I went back to read the mpr obituary. Such a close experience you had with him and his family. We have heard you in your work and interviews for so many wonderful years. Your time to recharge and continue your own journey is clearly now. Your description, even so brief, reminds me of so many wonderful and intentional people in their life discovery, experience and inner sharing. Like Thomas Merton, Henri Nouwen, the Dali Lama, zen, spiritual and life centering people. Thank you for sharing! Wish you so well and know that you will continue making life richer for all.

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